Turns out “Drunk in Love” is more than just a lusty collab track by Jay-Z and Beyoncé.
In fact, a medicine and biomedical engineer recently took to TikTok explaining why getting a little wasted boosts the beauty of basic barfly faces.
“Alcohol is absolutely amazing,” leading science commentator Dr. Karl Kruszelnicki said in a now-viral info-vid shared to his verified TikTok account.
“It can strip oil stains off a garage floor, but it can also change your human perception of reality,” the Australian scholar continued.
Kruszelnicki, a one-time NASA astronaut hopeful-turned-social-media superstar, pointed to a scientific study on the effects alcohol had on the perception of heterosexual college kids. The research, conducted in 2003, sought to determine how booze reshaped their sexual attraction.
“When it came to rating the attractiveness of other people, women found men a bit more attractive, but men found women a whole lot more attractive,” Kruszelnicki said in his post, which has amassed nearly 400,000 views.
“They called this an increase in the ‘Facial Attractiveness Index,’ ” he said. “And the rest of us call it ‘beer goggles.’ “
Toasting Kruszelnicki for his intoxicating science update, fans flooded his comments with buzzy banter about vague vodka vision and wobbly wine wisdom.
“At least 20 percent of the population was conceived because of beer goggles,” one saucy TikToker joked.
“When I start seeing my wife attractive I know I’ve had enough [to drink],” another tipsy user typed.
“So he really doesn’t think I’m pretty then,” another user said soberly, adding a teary-eyed emoji for emphasis.
Drinking it all in, Kruszelnicki regularly responds to followers’ inebriation inquiries with viral TikTok explainers.
He garnered a guzzling 3.5 million views with a post unpacking why people tend to get drunk fast when they mix hard liquor and diet soft drinks.
“Your stomach expels the liquid at a fixed rate of around two-to-three calories a minute,” he said in the video shared last month.
“So a rum and Diet Coke will get out of your stomach, into the next section, where it gets absorbed faster, and the blood alcohol level will go up higher and it will do it sooner than a rum and regular Coke.”
At the top of the year, Kruszelnicki broke down why liquor gives urine a clear tinge.
“Clear urine when drinking beer goes like this,” he said.
“Drink a six pack: urinate a 10 pack. 200ml of beer in, means 320ml of urine out,” he said, adding, “the alcohol acts on the anterior pituitary and interferes with your anti-diuretic hormone.
“Therefore, you start making huge amounts of urine and your pee is very light-colored because it’s diluted.”
Whether it’s translucent pee or making a sloppy mug appear sexy, alcohol definitely alters our sober swag.
A 2017 study even found that sipping on that hard juice actually makes straight men and women a little more loose with their sexuality.
The researchers discovered that the more toasted a heterosexual man got, the more likely he was to entertain the idea of gay sex. Similarly, the more a straight woman sucked down the suds, the more interested she became in doing the no pants dance with other ladies.
Well, bottoms up!